Did you know that tomatoes are not vegetables? Seriously. What’s that all about? (Sez the guy who can’t cook his way out of a produce bag.) And avocados, too! I judge which of the two main produce types on whether they are sweet or not their botanical makeup. “Hey buddies over for the big sporting event, I’ve got tortilla chips. The big question is does anyone want fruit in their guac? No? Okay, salt, pepper, red onions, cilantro, and serrano chiles it is!”

I don’t really know how to cook, as stated above. I don’t know what to write about with the subject being “Vegetable.” I should eat more of the stuff. From time to time a bring a bag of baby carrots to the family room and pretend they are Cheetos, but that doesn’t work. Apple slices would be more appetizing. That’s a fruit, right? Just checking.