“Grinning like a cat eating shit” Or is it “a shit-eating cat”? My struggle with basic English composition–despite my college degree

My English sucks! What’s worse is I graduated with a BA in Journalism and a minor in History–two subjects that require a student to write many essays and news pieces. I don’t know why I didn’t get kicked out of college. Perhaps it was because I (my parents, actually) kept paying for tuition.

Early indicators of just how bad my English is was when my friend Rick, who was the Entertainment Editor of the American River College Beaver (thankfully renamed The Current some years after I left) encouraged me to write a letter to the editor about a concert review which I vehemently disagreed. When I wrote the piece I used the “word” “worthwild.” Thankfully, Rick changed it to the correct “worthwhile.” That wasn’t a typo–I actually thought that was the word.

This post and all posts on this blog from July 1, 2014 onward have not been proofread by an outside source (i.e. an online service like Papercheck.com which did the lion’s share of editing for this blog before that date. Lame for two reason: One, this is just a stupid, self-centered blog that no one reads, and Two, well, go back to the second sentence of this post.

My English is so bad that I don’t remember grammatical terminology and when I have committed such grammatical crimes, what the offense is called. Okay, that didn’t make sense, right? (Part of this is because it is late, I’m waiting for a load of laundry to dry and then I’m going to bed.) 

Take, for example the title of this post; for years I used to say, “So-and-so was grinning like a cat eating shit” When Rick,again, heard me say this he laughed and said, “What? It’s “grinning like a shit-eating cat.” I didn’t understand the difference at the time and only recently have figured out the difference. Still, my English suffers, mostly thanks to my old age: I just don’t give a shit.

So, my dear mystery reader–I haven’t told any of my old friends that I have resurrected this self-serving blog, so you are most likely a stranger–if you have peruse these posts and wondered what’s with the horrible English, now you know. So stop grinning like a, well, you know!

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